Blustery Winds and Quiet Minds

I don't even know where to begin.
The beginning was so long ago now.

It's hard to believe it's been over six months since I've really written anything down.  I write in my head all the time... but haven't found those quiet moments to actually get it out.

It is freezing and snowy and icy outside, though the howling winds and swirls of clustered flakes have stilled.  So pretty in the night hours...

Life has been busy and still, if that's even possible.  I feel like I spend time on the outside looking in.  Into my life.  Our life.  Lost out there a lot in that space between breathing and suffocating.  But I find my way back now and again.

Rob has been on a "chemo holiday" for quite some time now.  At the last check, the cancer was still there, but the chemo was putting him into liver failure, so his docs put a stop to it, and worked on the liver for awhile.  

We went in to see Rob's surgeon in late Autumn and he was very happy to see Rob.  He said he would check up on us to see how Rob was now and then when he didn't see us.  He's a good and caring man, kind, compassionate... he talks openly and clearly, never rushes us, will sit and draw me pictures to explain things so I understand clearly.  He has made this pathway we're on better, and we are grateful for him.

July 2015

He told us that Rob has made it longer than he had expected, and we all rejoiced over that. :)  Rob is like the EverReady Bunny... takes a lickin' and keeps on tickin'.  Very cool. :)

Rob still wakes up in bad pain and takes meds every day to help him tolerate that, he still naps long and often, and enjoys just being home  --  discussing the day's current news and the past with his cyber friends that give him strength and reason.  He enjoys his funnies and his music, and all is good.  

There have been days on and off when Rob had aches and pains and changes when I tried to convince him that we should go see someone, but he said, "No."  I am not going to fight him.  I just say, "Okay."  Times of anger and confusion, but also times of silly jokes and smiles.  I spend a lot of time hidden away in my Quilt room, with lots of plans and ideas, but I fall asleep more than I accomplish things.

Rob doesn't like me to share pictures much anymore.  Maybe someday he will let me do that again.  If you saw pictures from early last year when he was undergoing second-round chemo  --  just before they pulled him off of it  --  you would have shared in my tears.  I thought for sure we were going to lose him.  But God had other plans...  He wasn't done with Rob yet.  *smile*

It's been nice not rushing from one doctor and/or treatment to another, week after week.  This "chemo holiday" has been a blessing in disguise for our mental states.  Toward the end of January things will start to change for us again...

Rob will be seeing the liver specialist to see how his liver has been affected by treatment, and then he'll be getting bloodwork a couple of times in early February.  On February 22nd, as long as all is okay, he will have the CT's redone on his chest, abdomen, and pelvis to check on the C monster.  We will see his surgeon the following week for the results, and his oncologist the next day for her take on everything.  The rest of the year will depend on what we see on paper and hear in their offices.  We will be patient and wait.

All this uncertainty with the over-hanging certainty has been heavy to carry for all of us, so being able to pretend for a few months that we were living a pretty normal life has been nice.  Now it's getting closer to being in view again, and we aren't quite done vacationing yet, such as it is.  But we are strong, and we are lifted in your prayers, and confident that God has this all under control.

Other updates of note...

* My daughter, who many of you know has Chiari and the myriad of medical conditions associated with it, passed out while camping with her family in mid summer, and ended up with a concussion.  This caused many of her symptoms to worsen and she has had so many days filled with excruciating pain and dizziness... And was later diagnosed with post-concussion syndrome, the effects lasting a year or so.  My heart breaks for all she has gone through, and continues to go through.  But she is strong, and she is a Warrior, and she is faith-filled and on fired for Christ, and she won't let Chiari take away her daily life, so she pushes on.  I am so proud of her, so inspired by her, so blessed by her.  And I am so thankful that God chose me to be her Mother, because I've come to know most about who He is through her.  ♥

* Then there's me. 

I am not a big doctor fan ever since the car accident in 1989 in West Bloomfield.  I got real tired of being shuffled from doctor to doctor as they poked and prodded and tried to unscramble me.  I believe this accident is what made Nicole's Chiari more pronounced, and left me with a closed head injury and two years of retraining therapy to function normally.  I deal with it everyday still, though others around me don't notice so much.  They just think I'm quiet sometimes, not realizing I'm trying to figure things out by pulling the right memory files from the right drawers.  Doesn't always work.  Mostly, though, it does.

In November I had a quick surgical procedure that has turned me into a bionic woman of sorts, as a handful of white coats try to figure out why my heart wants to pause for way too long at times, to the point of blacking out.  And on top of that, the incision has still not completely healed, and slowly leaks, 6 or so weeks since having it done.  They've put me on a couple of strong meds to no avail, and can't figure it out.

I think they are tears escaping from a broken heart, but what do I know.

*Summer was a fun time for me, going on escapades with my daughter and her hubby and my Grandbabies...  my JOY in every way!  Their smiles and little hands in mine, their pleads for me to stay with them...  they make my heart strong and fill me with sunshine and cool breezes!  Izzy and Ally, ages 8 and 6, participated in our church Christmas Program  --  AWESOME!  I love being such a big part in their lives, and having them be such a big part in mine.  They give me wings to fly!  And Benjamin runs to me when I walk through their door, asking to be held.  He waits for detailed explanations from me about everything he points to, as he gently pats my back.  :)

*Thanksgiving was filled with family and food and fellowship.  We pray yours was, too!  Christmas was quiet and relaxing, and filled with comfort and joy.  The New Year came in quickly and peacefully, and my Grandbabies got to experience banging pots and pans outside as my baby did, as I did.  Traditions!  

I am not one for resolutions, but I made a list of things I would like to accomplish:  Less TV, more Bible and prayer time, less busyness, more church, less spending, more saving, less cyber world, more real world, less Dove Dark, more healthy foods, more walking, more nature, more quiet, more art.  This is really my "Need" list.

~~~~~~~~~



Rob and I, as well as the rest of my family, thank you from the bottom of our hearts for your care and concern for all of us.  We thank you for lifting us in prayer, because we can attest over and over to being lifted out of the muck and mire and being carried to safe places by your prayers.

Days can be overwhelming if we're only looking at our days.  

But this time that we are in is such a brief moment in view of eternity.  It helps to put things into perspective to know that God will work all things for good for those who believe in His Kingdom, in His Son.  And we do.  

So these days, these valleys, these hurdles and setbacks... we can handle it all because we're not walking alone.  And that gives us strength, and power.  And a peace beyond all understanding.

And we're good with that. :)

I will update in early March to let you know the road we'll be on, and gratefully ask that God will richly bless your lives, as you (and He) have preciously done with ours.

In Peace and in Love,

Cheri  ♥

  

Firecrackers and Doctors

The summer heat is ferocious... well, to me, anyway!
Rob is dealing with it quite well, thanks to the a/c and the beautiful, cool evening soft winds.  

Me?  I am eternally an Autumn Girl. :)
 

Autumn, 2013

~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ 

 

Here's what's been happening in our part of the world...

Rob and I got the results of the CT last week, and the cancer is not gone, but it is "stable" for now, so Rob will remain on a chemo holiday for a bit longer.

 

These are the notes from the oncologist (Dr. B) visit last week:

• As you may remember, Rob is in stage 4 liver disease... the chemo did great damage to his liver.  So now we are seeing Dr. A, the nephrologist, tomorrow, to see what his plan of action will be.  Dr. B says the liver is taking priority right now.
•  Rob will redo the CT's again in September, but we will be checking in with Dr. B every 6 weeks.  Since the cancer is in the lymph nodes, when it takes off again, IT WILL TAKE OFF.  So, Dr. B wants to keep a handle on it.
• She gave us a list of symptoms to watch for regarding the cancer's return... she said we would know, that it will be "different" somehow.

From all the pre-tests Rob has had with Dr. A so far, we know there is much scarring in the liver, so we are hoping there is something that can be done to help strengthen it again.  Hoping.

In the meantime, Rob's hair is returning... eyebrows, beard, eyelashes, arms, legs, belly... he's looking like his old "Baer" self again (inside joke!)... ;)  
He is on a couple of stronger prescription pain meds now, because the headaches just don't stop unless he's sleeping, which he still does quite a bit of.  
He spends his awake time conversing with old friends and family on the beautiful gift of a new computer from Sister Holly and Brother Stu... which I thank them for from the bottom of my heart, too!!!  Facebook has become his connection to normal days where he can enjoy his music and share "funnies" with others.  I really am thankful he has that literally at his fingertips.

And his sense of humor?  Still intact.  :)

 

Rob doesn't leave the house much except for doctor's appointments, so to have him join some of the family for dinner on the fourth... it was great!!!  He filled up with food, smiles, little hugs, and probably one too many s'mores, but he had fun, and that's what mattered!!!  The grandkids were SO happy to see him!  They have had to stay away during the chemo because of Rob's immune system being shot.  They sure have missed "Mr. Rob" a lot!!!

We will celebrate our 4th Anniversary in two days, July 9th!
It's hard to believe so much has happened like it has...

Rob and I found each other and got back together in 2010, 
married in 2011, 
he was diagnosed with terminal stage IV cancer in 2012, 
surgery in 2013, 
and chemo on and off since then.

We have tiptoed through the dark valleys, and been carried over the crevices, and lifted back on the path to the mountaintops by your unfailing prayers...
I don't know how to even thank you for the time you've given us together, but I am humbled and grateful, and I thank you for keeping us in His arms through it all.

1st Anniversary, 2012

2nd Anniversary, 2013

 

3rd Anniversary, 2014

We know that the journey is not over, and there will most likely be more valleys and dark paths coming... more than we want.  But we are both filled with peace and calm, and a passion to make sure you all know where our strength comes from.  Because without our faith in God, in His Son Jesus, and without the prayers of His people... we would be lost in this darkness.  We know there is much to learn, and much to share.  And we welcome the opportunities He gives us... regardless of the circumstances.

So we say to the darkness... "Bring it on!!!"  
We have the power of God on our side!!!
Our time here, in reality, is but a brief dance on the wind.
Eternity is where it's at. :)

Enjoy your days... we are!  Enjoy the sunshine and flowers and summer breezes, the laughter and smiles, even the thunder and lightening and pouring rain.  Yes, and the non-stop firecrackers!  
Seasons of life... ahhhh, yes!

We'll be back soon.  Until then, do something good and fun and unexpected.  Pay it forward.  Love.  

Most importantly... Love. ♥  


In Love and In Peace,

Cheri (and Rob) ♥    

Gliding Along on Summer Breezes...

Hey, look who's back!!!

I know, we've been absent from here for quite some time.

Lots going on, and summer is here.  We've been enjoying the birds, and the breezes, and the nice days, and the stormy ones, too.  Rob's hair has been growing back slowly, and other than the never-ending headaches, and a few new pains here and there, he is a bit more chipper than he has been in some time.  He's decided to grow his beard back for a while, too.  The pics interspersed are from this morning... never ask a 'ham' if he wants his picture taken! LOL!

I'll fill you in a bit on what's been happening in our part of the world, here in crazy Michigan.  We'll just touch on the mountain tops, and keep the valley areas more private.  Just seems appropriate and needed.

As you remember, Rob had just begun his fourth cycle of chemo in April... scheduled for another several months of treatments.  While at the second Medical Short Stay visit, he received a phone call from his oncologist in the room, IV already started, explaining why she was stopping the chemo effective immediately.  His liver numbers were continuing to rise and she was afraid he'd go into liver failure.  

So we stopped, went home early (that was nice) and waited a week or so to go see Dr. B.  When we went for the appointment, she explained in more detail why she did what she did, and asked him to go see a nephrologist (liver specialist) within the next 1-2 days, her office to set it up for us.

Here in lies some of my frustration...

We finally got the gals to get the appointment set after six phone calls and four weeks.  You know how I got it done?  I called her office that sixth time and said, "I was wondering if you could do me a favor... Can you leave a message for the doctor explaining that the reason Rob hasn't gotten in to see the liver specialist within 48 hours of the appointment is because I've made six phones calls to the office and have yet to get anyone to help?  Just so she knows."


We got a call with the appointment within a day, and that was that. :)


So Rob had LOTS more tests done over the course of the last few days, and we have found out that the chemo had a detrimental effect on his ol' liver.  So the liver man, Dr. A, talked to Dr. B, and they are not going to do anymore chemo until they see what, if anything, they can do to help the liver.


Next week Rob will go in on Monday for the CT of his chest, abdomen, and pelvis so we can see what the cancer is doing, and we'll meet with Dr. B the next day to go over the results.  Then, as Dr. A explained, he and Dr. B will have to get together to figure out which to treat, and what the action plan will be.

In the meantime, we are just going to enjoy each day, even during the thunderstorms inside and out.  They are days to enjoy, days to cherish, and days that we will be thankful for, come what may.

Thank you all so very much for keeping us in your prayers and thoughts over these last couple of years...  You have no idea what an impact you have all had on our lives through everything.  Yes, there are overwhelming days still, filled with anger and tears, phone calls, and not-so-understanding bosses... but they pass quickly.  And when we stop getting lost in the muck, and just let it all go, the peace of God is ever so present  --  giving us strength and optimism and the spirit to go on.  Grace.  Yes.

Thank you is not enough... but thank you, to eternity and beyond. ;)

I'll be back next week (or so) to let you know what our action plan is.  In the meantime, your continued prayers would be so appreciated.

Have a blessed day, week, and summer!!!  Even here in Michigan where there seems to be more rainy days than sunny ones lately!  
At least we have the days! :)

May God richly bless you all. 

In Love and In Peace,

Cheri ♥  

At a Standstill... Sort of

Some days it feels like I just started this blog for Rob.  

Other days it seems like a lifetime ago.

(Rob and I, pre-C  --  2012)

It was four weeks this past Monday since Rob had any chemo treatments.

If you remember, he was sent home after the IV had already been started for his second round of the fourth cycle of chemotherapy for stage IV bladder cancer.  Rob got a call in the medical short-stay unit from his oncologist to stop the treatment as he was finishing the third of the pre-drugs and about to get the actual chemo...  The change in plans was due to the blood work results that were drawn when we got there.

(Stock photo)

Rob's liver counts were high, and climbing dramatically each week.  His doctor was afraid he would go into liver failure if he received the treatment.

So... Rob, sister Holly, and I packed up and went home to wait for a few weeks to recheck the numbers.  We saw Dr. B this past Tuesday and she had more blood drawn to check Rob's liver counts.  

We got the results back yesterday.  

Four weeks since his last chemo treatment, and the numbers are even higher.  They are continuing to climb, and we don't know why.

I have a theory...  the liver filters out toxins, and the docs have been pumping him full of poison pretty much straight since November of last year.  And that doesn't count the four months of the initial treatments in early 2013.

(Stock photo)

But Rob is strong.  

And his body is working hard to fight this beast.

So Dr. B is referring Rob to a hepatologist  --  a physician who specializes in the diagnosis and treatment of diseases of the liver, gall bladder, pancreas and biliary tree.  Rob is not big on the idea of seeing yet another specialist.  Or any doctor for that matter.  When he called me at work yesterday to tell me this latest news, he said to me, "The cancer is going to get me, they can't stop that.  Why should we pay to go to more doctors?"  I told him it might be a good idea to at least find out what exactly is causing the high numbers.  He reluctantly agreed for now.  We are waiting to hear back from Dr. B's office on where and when the appointment will be.

(Patience please, Lord.)

(Stock photo)

Dr. B has officially put Rob on a "chemo holiday" for awhile, as she said the chemo at this point is not a good option.  She said his body is not tolerating it, so she wants him to rest for a bit.  He'll have the CT's again on his chest, pelvis, and abdomen toward the end of June to check on the cancer growth, and we'll meet with Dr. B the following day to get the results.  

So as far as the chemo goes, Rob is on "holiday" for the near future.

He continues to deal with headaches that stop him in his tracks and contort his face in ways that intense pain can, but he says they are not as bad as they were.  So that is good.  He is trying to get by on lesser strength pain meds, just because he wants to right now.  Dr. B told him if he needs anything stronger to let her know, and he can get it.

I was home today.  Work wasn't an option for many reasons.  Mostly I just needed to be home.  The sun has been out all day, the temps are warming back up again, birds have been chirping as they play amongst the branches of the flowering trees, children on the playground...  The world continues and life goes on all around us.

(Me)

When I am not being filled with smiles and joy from my baby and her babies, I find myself so deep in thought.  More and more.  I pray and cry out to God with all the goods and all the bads, all the joys and all the fears.  My relationship with Him is stronger each day, and it is so much closer than ever before.  And it is so good.  

One moment I feel like I will shake apart at the seams, and the next, I am breathing peacefully as He whispers life into me with each breath.  Contemplating.  Being.  Praying for guidance, praying for wisdom.  Seeking answers I may or may not hear.  The "yes" answers are mostly comforting, the "wait" ones are the hardest, and the "no" ones are mixed...  sad at the loss of made-up hopes and dreams, but happy at being able to let go, finally and forever, and get back to living.

So many words and pictures and songs and dreams swirling around in my being day and night, and I am finding comfort in not feeling like I have to have answers, or control.  I just have to have faith, and trust, and be obedient.  And whatever the future holds, it's all going to be okay.  Because God knows best, and He works all things for good for those who believe and love Him.  

And I believe.

And I love Him.

In this I go on.

~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~

Rob and I continue to be humbled and grateful for the love and prayers and support expressed to and for and about and around us both... it is all felt and appreciated, and we love you all more than words can say.

I will update when I know more.  

About anything. :)

(Found during an afternoon walk...)

In love and in peace,

Cheri ♥ 

Late, Early, and an Abrupt Stop

(Stock Photo)

I am late in updating the blog.  Many good reasons, some to come.

I am early in the day as I write, compared to normal.  Again, a good reason.  Thunderstorms are rolling in soon, and my techy things will be unplugged.

And the abrupt stop came about this afternoon...

(I don't have any new pics today, but will stick in a few older things here and there.)

Last week was one of the hardest and craziest I've been through, and I am so glad it's over.  Worship on Sunday morning filled me with hope, and the storm clouds were washed from my eyes and heart so I could clearly see again.  

And breathe.  

Enough on that.

2010

Last Monday Rob began the fourth cycle of chemotherapy, with hopes of going another three months before having to take a break.  He knows that the cancer will grow during the break times, which is why he wanted to just keep attacking it as long as he could.

He tolerated the treatment like the fighter he is, and spent much of the treatment, and week, sleeping and taking pain meds.  He's moving a bit slower, and doesn't have too much to say most days, but he stays in touch with all of his friends on Facebook, and they keep him going strong, and keep a smile on his face and in his heart.

Today we went to the hospital for his second treatment of chemo.  He takes three pre-chemo drugs/IV's, then the actual chemo drug.  Well, he was almost through the third pre-drug, when the nurse came in and handed him the phone, saying his oncologist would be calling any moment... and the chemo was cancelled.

2011

It seems both of Rob's liver numbers are high.  Not just high.  But HIGH.  One is over five times the normal high level, and the other is just over eight times the normal high level.  She told Rob that if he took the chemo drug, he could go into liver failure.

So, Rob agreed with her that he will rest for the next few weeks, and we will revisit with his oncologist on May 12th to re-check the bloodwork and see where to go from there.

He was pretty quiet on the way out of the hospital today, and is feeling a bit down about having to stop already after only one treatment in this fourth cycle.  But we both know that things happen for a reason, and whether we understand everything fully or not, that's okay with us.

He came home and went to sleep, and is sleeping still.  He doesn't look well and he doesn't feel well, but he is still big and strong and still has lots of fight inside.  He just needs a little rest time, that's all.  

And that's okay.

(Stock Photo)

The weather has started to even out in a good Spring way.  

Lots of sunny coat-free days and nice, nice breezes.  

The kind you stand in with your eyes closed as the bad all wisps away from you... inside and out.  

I like  --  no, I need those days.  More of them.

(Stock Photo)

I have found myself reflecting quietly a lot, in between hysterical outbursts when everything keeps going wrong.  But those quiet times are holding me together.  I told my daughter that at times I just feel a constant humming, keeping me from frazzling apart.  I am lost in thoughts... mostly mindless ones, but deep ones, too.  I find it's best most days to just keep my mouth closed and keep my hands busy and let my mind run free.  
God is working on me, molding me...  

For what, I don't know.  

But it's going to be good.  :)

So unless something drastic changes before May 12th, I won't be seen or heard from too much.  

I am escaping to nowhere for awhile.

(Stock Photo)

I am so thankful for you... for you all.  I have felt your prayers wrap around us, I have heard and read your encouraging words, I listen to music that captures my soul, and I rest in His arms, secure.

Thank you ♥ 


In Love and Truly Wrapped in Peace,

Cheri ♥

(Stock Photo)

 

On Your Mark, Get Set...

Greetings!

So much to fill in since we last spoke. :)

We welcomed Spring, and welcomed a freak snowstorm.  So I set up our balcony belongings shortly thereafter, and so far, no more snow.  
I like to think I helped.  ;)

 

Easter was spent with family...  
Rob's sister Holly joined me and most of my family for church service, where Izzy danced in praise to God... so nice!  Then we went to Mike and Colie's home and laughed and spent time in fellowship as we shared a homemade brunch of French toast and bacon.  Later in the day, I joined with my immediate family at my sister's home where enjoyed more time with those that were able to come.

Izzy is in blue in the front toward the left... this was beautiful :)

Rob was not up to joining us for any of the day as he was not feeling the best, and wanted to stay home to rest and sleep.  But he gave us his blessings to attend the celebrations with his best to all.  We spent the afternoon together, and later evening together as he dozed on the couch.  I did notice when I got home that there was less Easter candy than what the Bunny brought for him that morning...

~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~

Rob had his CT on March 30th, and we were quietly on edge waiting until we saw his oncologist, Dr. B, Tuesday.  We had received the results a few days prior, and were waiting to talk with her about what it all meant, and what to do from here.

The barrage of chemo treatments seemed to help, as the cancerous lymph nodes and masses did shrink  --  not a lot, but at least they didn't continue to grow, and that's what she was hoping for. 

Last Saturday night, Rob's lower legs, ankles, and feet were very swollen, and I was on the phone with the on-call oncologist right away.  Long story short, I got home about 10pm after driving an hour round trip to a 24-hour pharmacy to get some Lasix to take the swelling down until we got in to see Dr. B Tuesday.  

These are the decisions that were made at the appointment yesterday:

• Rob chose to continue with a fourth cycle of chemo (3 months) to try to continue to shrink the cancer.  Dr. B, although she initially wanted to give him a "chemo holiday," went along with Rob's wishes since his blood count numbers are holding up well enough to continue.  I'm a little worried about the toll it will take on him due to his current condition, but it's what he wants.  So he will start up again this coming Monday.
• Dr. B wrote an order for a venus doppler on both his legs for today (Wednesday) to rule out a blood clot, since though the swelling in his lower legs was down, it was still not gone.  So we spent most of the late afternoon at Beaumont getting the ultrasound done.  We left with a big smile on Rob's face after bring told there were NO blood clots!  PTL!  We'll have to talk with her again to get more meds if the swelling doesn't disappear.
• This time, Rob will have 3 weeks of chemo, and one week of rest, for the next three months.  Hopefully it will take a lesser toll on him  --  with the week break here and there  --  considering where he's starting from this time around.
• We will see Dr. B again in 4 weeks so she can keep a close eye on him.

 

Rob doesn't want me taking pictures of him right now, as he keeps saying he just sees "death".  I don't like hearing that.  He thinks the death jokes are funny, so we go with it.  He did approve this picture... it was not against his will.  ;)

As for me?  
I am finally over my sickness... it lasted 19 days!  However, I have been breaking out in hives for the last week.  Not sure if it's my body cleansing from the illness, or the stress trying to get out.  :)

I am missing a lot of work, and spending free time with Nicole or hiding out in my quilt room.  There is a lot of quiet time, with my Riley-boy by my side.  He is still getting in trouble, but he's so cute it's hard to stay angry.  The world is still big and new to him, having only been in it for just over 8 months now... and there is so much to explore!  He's a big boy, over 52 pounds so far, and though he's a bit wild around others, he is a gentle boy with his Mom, and knows how to play my heartstrings.  

And I just love his expressions, and I love his ears.

His dog bed is rarely FLAT on the floor... he wrestles with it!

I find I surround myself with old movies, music, and lots of quiet as I float through these days.  I get lost in daydreams.  Time is disappearing.  

I've been stressing about so much, though I know I shouldn't.  I don't mean to do it... it's just there.  Things pop into my head, like whether to renew our lease or not, but I have been set straight by family not to fret about those things right now... It's a small worry in the big picture of life.  So as hard as it is for me, I have let that go, and will stop looking for somewhere else to land.  

It's really hard to keep my ducks in a row when I don't know which pond they're on.

Well, we are due for severe storms tomorrow (Thursday) evening.  I don't like that.  They always bring back thoughts of the tornado of 1976 I went through.  Took many years to get over those memories.  Of course these storms are due to hit in the dark hours when we can't see them coming...  We'll just hear them, and feel them, but not know what's actually coming at us.

Isn't that how life is sometimes?  
You can't always see what's coming.  That's where TRUST comes into play... believing, having faith.   

I think these storms are trying to remind me of some things I shouldn't let fear take away. 

(Deep breath.  In and out.  Over and over.  Thank you, dear Lord.  Yes, I'm listening...)

No matter what, it's going to be okay.  No matter what. 

This I know.


In Love and Peace,

Cheri  ♥