Two Steps Forward...

Even though the days have been bitterly cold lately, the sun is still making an appearance and warming it up enough for walking... which Rob, Darby, and I have been doing almost every day now!

Yesterday, we walked all the way down our street to the 'long' corner, 930 steps!  You may wonder how I know that...?  Well, on the walk TO the corner, we talked as we walked.  On the way back, Rob was concentrating on mind-over-pain to make it the rest of the way, so he was quiet.  Darby was enjoying romping in the snow.  And I decided to count our steps to keep my mind off the fact that I was freezing!  Then I just doubled it.  So clever, eh?!?  Ahhh, the things I do to amuse myself!

Rob is making great progress, day by day.  He's still moving slow, and is noticing more 'pulling' sensations around the stoma sight, and a generalized soreness in the whole body area.  The doctors did an awful lot of maneuvering and rearranging, so it's to be expected.  I am so proud of all the pain Rob is working through so he can keep getting stronger.  He is trying so hard!  When we walk, or when he showers, it completely wipes him out, and he spends a lot of time sleeping.  But that's the way his body is healing... while he rests.  So I tell him, "keep resting."  And I watch him as he sleeps.  And I wish I could take all this pain and ugliness away from him.

We have a lot of quiet times now.  We have times when we just look at each other, not knowing what to say, but at the same time, saying so much back and forth in that silence... (I love you, I'm sorry it hurts, help me, how can I save you, why did this happen, do you still love me, I can't stop crying, what if there's more, is this going to stop, hold me, I'm scared, I'm angry, help me, God make me stronger...).  

And we just smile, and are content, as God wraps us in the comfort of your prayers.  It's going to be okay.  No matter what, it's going to be okay.

~~~

When Rob was in the hospital, it was a pretty critical time, and I kept updating quite often.  Being at the hospital for 15 hours a day made that easy!  The healing time here at home is moving slowly, so my updates will be fewer and farther between.  But that's a good thing!

Rob has an appointment with the surgeon on Wednesday afternoon.  He will get his belly unstapled, his kidney's unstinted, and we pray, that we will hear a wonderful pathology report from the surgery.  I will blog that evening with what we find out.  

Please, if I can ask so much... keep praying that the cancer is all gone, that with all they have done to my husband  -  with the cutting and removing and rebuilding and changing him  -  that it is enough.  

I really would like to take a moment to say thank you again to all of you...  

For those who have been keeping Rob (and me) wrapped in prayer, we have felt every one, they have kept us going, kept us strong, and kept us washed in peace...

For those who have sent cards, meals, and shared yourselves with us, brought us laughter and smiles, helped us to step  out of the valley if even for a moment...

For those who have sent gifts and financial help, you have no idea how much that has meant to us.  When the doctor told us that I would have to be home with Rob for up to 8 weeks, I went right to the place of humanness, and wondered how, without any paid leave from work, that could possibly happen...?  My daughter told me, "Mom, God will take care of you."  And He has been.  Everytime something new comes at us that was not expected, God works it all out.  And my faith is so much stronger because of you blessing us.
      
So thank you, our dear friends.  Thank you deeply, thank you sincerely, from humbled and grateful hearts... we thank you. ♥

In Great Love and In Deep Peace,

Cheri ♥ 

(I just want to mention again, as noted in the sidebar area, that I am not able to reply to comments that are made on this blog.  I have researched over and over, have all my page margins set as I should, but when I try to reply, it's sent off into the cyberworld somewhere... just not on this page!  So please know I read and appreciate each comment, but I can't post a reply or comment of my own.)